...... The first time was really hard. I did not get my "wow girl" out of my brain and heart. I tried to get a friendship with her. But if we could speak online it was not like before. If I asked something, I got only answers like "ok" or "sure" and such things. It was not possible to come nearer to a friendship. Anyway I started to work, so that I was the whole week busy and we had only some short chats between. Emotional I felt not really good. One thing was clear. I had to finish the old stories somehow, to go further. Suzie called one day and she wanted to meet me, but I was not in mood to see her, especially if she thought I run direct if she only called that she is back in Manila, then she missed. Sol continued with her story that she is pregnant, but still not able to bring the honest prove from a doctor. Alma, she is the "wow girl", wanted to meet me, we made a date, I was on the way as I got the message of the cancellation..... I was really tiered of all this games.
I had to clean it all out. I sent Suzie a message that I wait for her on Saturday afternoon ten minutes in a Mal on her and that this will be her last chance to meet me, otherwise she will never get the possibility to go in touch with me. How I expect... she did not show up. I made an appointment with Sol that we can go together to the doctor for the proof.... also Sol did not show up to the appointment.. and this all without message. Really interesting, almost one message after the other but if its for me important... silent on the mobile.
I tried to be concentrated in my new job, sometimes Randy and I had some drinks after work, some flirts with easy girls and I tried to enjoy the paradise. I dated some girls, but with my feelings and heart I was somewhere else. From my first wages I bought a owner type jeep, so that I could be a little bit more flexible in my moving. This was the idea. This car was like a woman, it was not sure if I do not stand in the night somewhere and nothing works, or if I will come home. On the first weekend as I got the car and I thought that now everything is fixed, I answered a message from my "wow girl" if she is prepared for an adventure, she only needs to answer with "yes" or "no". She answered with "yes" and I replied that I will pick her up in two hours in her place. She gave me a new meeting point and I was with my funny new car on the way. Traffic on Saturday afternoon in Manila is not funny. But I was on the way. In the car my Speedminton rackets, some towels and what is necessary for a nice weekend on the beach. This was the idea, to pick her up and to make a trip to the next beach. I should pick her up in Cubao, a part of Quezon City, were she spent the night before at her aunts place. I was standing in the traffic and I sent her a message that I will be soon there and she should tell me where she will wait. I got the answer that I should choose the place and she will come if I will be there. I choose a coffee near the place and I sent her a message where I am... No answer. Fifteen minutes later I sent the second message, if she will come now or not... No answer. I called her. I woke her up with my call. I thought:' how can it be?' A half a hour before I arrived she answered direct.. I asked her whats on, that I wait for her and that I came now extra there to meet her. It was a little bit noisy around and the line was not really good, so I sent her once more a message. I felt anger started in me growing. The answer from her was. ' Sorry I feel really bad. my stomach hurts so much maybe next time.' I don t want to believe what I read on my phone... I answered only 'ok...thanxs'... and I now it was clear. That's it.. no longer silly games from this girl. This is not the way. This things you do only if you really hate someone. What did I to her? She knew exactly that I was on the way through half of the city, in Saturday afternoon traffic. I was more then angry. On top, on the way home the car stopped in the middle of the highway and it starts to rain.. What a day.. its starts with an idea, I wanted to create not a new relationship, I wanted to start with a good friendship..this was the idea. Now I was standing with my funny car on the highway in the night, and nothing works. That someone stopped and helps you?.. Not in this country. They are looking all friendly with a smile in the face, but no one helps. I tried it once more to bring this car to move, and ... what a wonder after fifteen minutes nothing.. the car was running normal. I was happy that I could leave the highway and I drove slowly beside on the normal road back home. This topic with Alma was done for me... i will never go in touch with her from my side. This is not the way to tread friends, and this is what she wanted from me.... She made herself invisible in her messenger and also from her side no contact.. I found on this day an interesting sentence in my horoscope: "Let people from your past stay in your past for now. They offer nothing but drama."... Maybe I should read my horoscope more often.....
In this time Raquel was living with me in my house. Raquel and I we are really good friends and she was running away once more from her family. We met us long time ago and since this time we are friends, so it was clear I help her if I can. I gave her space and time to think about herself. She cleaned the house and was washing all the clothes while I was working. I called her always "my smiley girl" because she is always happy, not inside but she never shows her problems.
In the new job it became more and more strange. I started with then job training with two other new employers. In the first week all was great, we got good information, we were a good group of motivated employers. It was for me after nine month doing only my things a new experience to work regular. In the second week we became in our small group a guy who is there in this company since two years employed and he should get the chance to change his job to get a dealer service representative like we. He was not really motivated because he did not want to go on this position in this company but the management pressed him in. From this day all changed in the training. After one more week an other new employed guy shows up and the trainer started to be more interested in the new guy as in continue our training that we can start with our job so soon as possible. There was something wrong. It is usual that after a theory training the status get proved, but after the first test only one of us passed the test. Melissa, Ronny, the guy who was long time employed there, and I we failed the first test. We could not understand why.. it is really not so difficult to understand what is important in the work flow. They made the test once more with us and... once more we failed. Between the new guy got private lessons from the trainer and we were only there, but complete ignored, questions were only answered beside. The second test was near the same then the first. But the points we got for the same answer was different. On top they told us suddenly, that we get now the last chance to make a third test and if we will fail once more we are out of the training and the company. No one from the employers understood this way from the management. Not usual and the first time that they did it like this. And... it was clear.. we will fail also the third time.. it was their plan. In the third test they included not relevant questions for the job, we should do in the future, and they asked us suddenly things they were mentioned only as beside information one time, also we never got the promised summary about the work flow, we asked so often about. Why? I can only assume. They used us as dummy that they have a reason to kick out Ronny from of the company. I got intern the prove for it, but I did not get it official.. so I can only assume. Silly, but this was the way in this company. Later on I got the message that the new guy passed the first test direct.. what a wonder...???
In this time I met Marife online. She contacted me first with a message in one of the date lines, I did not react. Like her profile there, 27, from Davao, not married and no kids. One day, she contacted me direct about my messenger. She is from Davao, far away from Manila, I had never in my mind to meet her so soon. I enjoyed only the funny chats with her every day. She brought me on other thoughts in this time we could meet us online and I forgot for a while all the strange things around the job and my private life. Sometimes in the morning if I opened my laptop and my messenger she was still online with her cam and I could watch her sleeping.. So cute. She was smiling while she slept. What a start in the day.
In a funny mood I invited her to come here to Manila with a one way ticket and we make an open end date. She can stay so long she want and she can be sure nothing will happen what she is not agree... anyway we were in front of a long weekend around May 1st and we would have time to know us better. She liked this idea and we planed that she will come about this long weekend, but only as friend. Tuesday, she sent me a message that she will come earlier.. she planed to come not Friday, she wanted to come the next day and that she is in the travel agency and if she should buy the ticket now. Normally no problem, but I had to work in this time as she will arrive at the airport and how to pick her up? I told it all to Raquel.. She offered direct to pick her up and I don't need to be worry. She will care about till I will come home in the night. My working shift was European time, so I had to work between 3PM and midnight. I could be earliest at home at 12:30 AM. Raquel said she will manage it. Ok.. Marife got the information that Raquel will pick her up, she booked the ticket. The day of arrival Raquel and I drove with my car for shopping , but on the way home the car stopped once more and it was not possible to start it again. We put the car on a secure place because I got really short in time to go to work. We took a trike with all the things we bought, I jumped quickly under the shower and went to work. All other things were organized.
I was the whole day really exited. There was a cute girl on the way to Manila. I was proud that a girl is doing things like this. She did not know who I am, she did not know what will happen if she is here, but she trusted me. How brave is this. Of course I can trust myself, but she travelled in an adventure. Between I got the update from Raquel, that all is ok, that she arrived and that they are on the way to my house. It was only one hour till I would be at home as they arrived. I drove with Randy at home and as I opened the door we saw us the first time in real. The girls had their chat and all seems perfect. Raquel and I decided that she will stay minimum till Friday so that Marife will not be alone in a place she don t know. We were direct familiar like old friends they meet after along time. Raquel went in her room to sleep and Marife and I started to chat in the living room. I offered her to sleep in my room and that I use the sofa downstairs, but she decided that we share my bed. Anyway it was clear that we are friends, and, maybe its not normal in a situation like this, but I can sleep beside a cute girl without touching on the wrong place. We prepared us for the bed, she wanted to sleep in her clothes and I was really tiered from the day. As I turned around, our faces were very near... suddenly we started to kiss.. it was not planed, not from her side and not from my side, but the kisses were sweet. I woke up in the morning and I saw her smile life beside me. What a wonderful feeling to see it in front of me and not only in the cam like before sometimes. I went downstairs and Raquel was sitting there with all her things she brought with her as she showed up. She told me that she will leave this day because she has to go to Pampanga to get her job back. She was there as she run the first time away from her business she wanted to start. She planed on this morning to go back there. I heard her in the night that she was not really sleeping, but I did not expect that she wanted to run away so quickly. She promised me before that she wanted to stay till Friday, but she decided to go on this morning. I saw some reactions as Raquel and Marife met in this morning, but it was clear between me and Raquel that we are friends and that I can help her only for some days. She could stay, no problem. I never would kick someone out of my house, especially not a special friend like Raquel. I was happy that she wanted to help me and that she created a nice welcome to Marife. I took my coffee and I was watching the two girls. Somehow they could not handle each other. Raquel managed the house perfect, and Marife tried to get the feeling to be at home. A little bit shy in this situation, but what you can expect from someone in this situation. After a while Raquel packed her things, turned around and was away. I could not understand her, like so often since we know us, so I let her go. She is a traveller, I think she runs away from herself. I connected her in the time as she was in my house with Cristina, a good friend of mine, and I thought this could work with Marife in the same way. But I missed...
It was raining this Thursday as if someone opened all air-locks. It was time to go to work. I felt not good to leave Marife alone in the house, but I had no other choice. I was nervous about this day, because this was the day of test three in the company. I still don't have an umbrella, so I got a little bit wet on the way to the company shuttle. On the way I got a message from Marife that she miss me already.. I went to work with a big smile in my face. Between my preparation for the final test I sent her some texts to be sure that she is ok and I was looking forward to the long weekend with her. The test failed, I resigned a contract I never got and Randy took me with him after our shift. I received a call on the way home from Marife, but I did not realize that it was not her phone she called. I was in the car and I did not expect that something maybe happen, anyway we were very near and we only wanted to start my car on the way, that I can bring it home. The car started directly and Randy followed me to my house. As we arrived I saw first my landlady, I thought what is she doing here in this time. It was 12:45 AM. Then all full of police and at last Marife, only in T-shirt and shorts. The face full of tears. I stopped the car in the middle of the road and jumped out. Marife direct in my arms. What was happen? She told me that two guys came in my house and that they robbed her money, her two mobiles and my laptop.... After three times asking if they did something to her she offered me that they raped her as well... I was in shock.. This in my house.. to a girl who trust me that all is secure and nothing will happen to her while she is there... I could not believe.. My landlady was shouting around, why a unknown girl is in my house while I am not there and she called her... I can not repeat, I am still in shock about such reaction and treating my guest. Marife got the horror and this woman has nothing better to do then to attack her. Of course it was for me also a stupid situation. What should I answer if they ask me who is this girl. I answered she is my new girlfriend and that she is the first day alone at home, but as they asked how long we know us, they were looking really surprised as I told them the truth that we know us only one day personally and that we met us online in a date line. But why to lie? I had no doubt that Marife tells the truth. Why she should create such a story? I was happy that Randy was there and that I had a support in the background. The two guys came through the back door. I opened this door always if I am at home that the wind goes through the house. I did not told Marife before I left to close the door in the night. She was sleeping in the living room in front of the TV and the door was open. Only the small door inside with the mosquito net was closed.. but this is not a real door for secure. The two guys were climbing over the wall closing the light and putting a knife on her head. She thought first as she woke up its me who kissed her, only as she felt that this guy has hairs she realized that it can not be me. Only the sound of a trike in front of the house saved her as she told the guys that I come home.. they run away, back over the wall and she was alone... The neighbour beside heard her crying in front of the house and they helped her in the first moments... She could not call me direct. The mobiles with my number were lost. She called me from the mobile from my landlady... but this was one hour later.
The rest of the night we spent on different police stations. First in the local outpoint, they reported the case in a book. Marife showed her passport. I was in wonder that this passport was marked with holes. My landlady always beside, and she continued to attack her. I had to stop her with her comments. Marife was in the process to renew her passport and her normal ID was in her stolen wallet. Should she show up on the police without identification? I felt the police don't believe her and they were more interested in my stolen laptop then what happen to her. The reaction after all from Marife was normal, she shows maybe not the typical reactions of a woman after an experience like this, but this can not be the reason not to believe. We got sent to the mayor police station for investigation and we travelled in the middle of the night to the other side of Paranaque City. The same process. Once more the case got reported in a book. The policeman was more exited about my stolen laptop and also he did not believe Marife. My landlady was busy flirting with Randy and continued with her respect less comments. Only our neighbour and I, we tried to protect Marife in front of this wall of mistrust. It was 4 AM as I suddenly received a message from one of the stolen mobiles of Marife. I received a message I got in the afternoon from her. This comes now from one of the guys. I saw a chance to catch them. I answered and I offered them a lot of money for my laptop in hope that I can make a deal and to catch them on this way. Anyway they could not use the computer, first password protected, second all programs in German, then without charger... difficult to use it or to sell it to someone. They replied with an higher price I offered them. I was agree, but I never got any answer or message from them...
Between they separated us and I had to go in an other room. As I came in there, three drunken men were laying around and it was smelling there like in a bar. One of them reached to stand up from his sleeping place and looked at me like someone looks if you are complete drunk. He took a seat in front of and old dirty computer, but he was only looking on his monitor. He played with the mouse, but nothing happen on his monitor. The computer was off. Then he stood up, opened a small book on the table beside, opened it, found nothing interesting in, closed it and went back in front of his monitor. This all without any word. He played with his mouse, but still nothing happened on his monitor. At last he reached it to open the computer somehow and he asked my name. His job was only to fill out a form to order the special investigators to safe the finger prints in my house. I spelled him my name and my address. Letter by letter. As he tried to read it once more, nothing was right. I stood up, asked if I can have a look and if I can help him somehow. As I saw what this man typed in the form it was clear that he can not read it. He was so drunk that he typed my details always one or two letters beside the right one on the keyboard. In the end I filled out the form so that it can be sent out to the other office for investigation. Fifteen minutes later I could leave this show and I left the office. My landlady still by flirting with Randy, he was really nerved from her. But a scandal on the police station in this time was not a really good idea, so he tried to be patiently and kept her away from their attacks against Marife. The result of the visit on this police station was, the special investigators will come some hours later and that we should not touch anything in the house. Also, Marife and I we should come some hours later once more, cause she has to speak with a female officer as well.
It was 6 AM as we were back at home, but was it still my home after all what was happen the last night? It was holiday May 1st, I expected from this weekend really some happy moments and not a horror trip like this. We tried to cam down and to sleep, but really sleep was not. I was sad, angry and disappointed that things like this are happen to my guest and me in my home. Two hours later i got the information that the special investigators will come later, so we used the time to drive once more to the main police station so that Marife can make the interview with the female officer and that she get the paper for the medical tests. Our neighbour supported us that we get treated correct from the police. Once more the case got reported in a big book. We filled out a new form, and I realized that Marife is not 27, like in her profile, she is only 20. I looked at her as I realized it, but I said nothing in this moment. This was the wrong place and time to clear this point. But it was working in my head.. was there something wrong with her? Was she maybe included in all? Are they all right in the doubt against her? Was there something more what I should know and she is hiding in front of me? It was not logic that she is included in this crime and that all was planed from her. To go through all the investigations, questions and doubts only about a laptop, some money and two mobiles? She could have it much more easier, she was long enough alone at home. She paid her ticket to Manila by herself, there is no profit. Makes no idea to create a story like this. I had no doubt that all was true she told about the last night. We got a new paper for the highest investigation office, NBI, for the medical prove. Before this was not made she could not take a shower, so we had to do it at the same day. But first we had to drive back home, we still was waiting for the special investigators. Raquel called, I sent her a massage in the night as the police asked me who else was in the house the last days, and I told her short what was happen in the last night. She was still in Manila, not like I expect in Pampanga, four hours bus travel from Manila. I asked her to come to my house, that the police can take her finger prints as well and that they will not search for the wrong person. Also I thought it is maybe good if a woman supported Marife. Raquel arrived in the same time as the investigators were arrived. Once more to fill out forms, they took from us the finger prints, and they powdered all full to find some more prints. It was like in the TV. They packed an empty box of cigarettes in plastic, I found it in the bathroom, and a half smoked cigarette from the floor. One hour later all was done and the investigators were leaving. In all this trouble was not the time to speak with Marife alone about her age.
Raquel, Marife and I had to travel to the NBI for the medical prove. I only wanted to take a shower after this night and then to the next step. The water was once more not running. I wanted to see on this day everyone but not my landlady, after all she said in the last night. But I had no other choice. The water has to be fixed. I sent her a message and she showed up with the plumper. While the plumper tried to fix the water this woman started to attack Raquel and Marife once more and she complained that the house was not cleaned. Sorry, but after so many police and investigations, how should the house be clean? She yelled around and titled the girls with the worst words I ever heard from a woman. And this from a woman who thinks she is in business, this was once more without respect. Especially if she tries in the background to start beside her marriage an affair with Randy. (She send till today nearby everyday a message to Randy and tries to get a date). Now it was time to show her the barrier. It is her job to secure a property that things like last night can never happen and it is not her thing who is my visitor and that she should show more respect in front of my visitors and to control her words. The plumper was finish and I asked her to go out of my view before i forget my good education. Then it was silent for a while. I took my shower, then we left the house for the travel to the NBI. I decide to drive with the taxi, because I had no mood on this day to stop with my car somewhere and with the jeepney through the city after this night was also not really funny. Raquel chatted with the driver and Marife felt in sleep on my shoulder. I watched out of the window and tried to find the reason for all. It was really difficult to wake up Marife as we arrived the office in Manila. If she sleeps, then really deep. First we had to go in this building in the investigation office. May 1st, holiday, the office was full with the families from the officers, they had their family party there, with a lot of food, the TV was running and we were standing there in the middle of the room, tiered, frustrated and once more the case got written down in a big book. Once more the police man did not believe Marife, my laptop was more important. The same like before. After all was reported once more, the girls were sent to the medical office and the officer took me beside and asked me about my point of view. We had a good talk about all and I had the feeling they will do really something to find the two guys. I followed to the medical office were the girls got asked once more. Once more the case got reported in a big book. The doctor asked me if I agree that he will make the investigation with Marife and I told him, that he should better ask her if she is agree that a man is doing it. Anyway we had no other choice, a female doctor was only on the next day available. Raquel supported Marife, I was waiting outside. I called my sister, I had the feeling I have to speak with someone.
Twenty minutes later and after three times running upstairs to make some copies and to get from an other office a stamp on the papers, we were finish in this office with a new appointment in the hand to pick up the result one week later. I was now 36 hours without sleep. It was 6 PM, we all were tiered and hungry. On the way home we went to eat, but we all did not speak so much. The food did not taste, I thought about to make a scandal in this restaurant about the grab they served, but I decide to take it from the easy way. I was to tiered. The taxi driver did not know were he should bring us. I showed him the way were he could drop us out in front of a 24 hours shop, we bought some things for at home and the then we used a jeepney for the rest of the way at home. Marife was sleeping on my shoulder and Raquel was busy with her mobile. All I wanted on this moment was sleeping.
As I woke up in the morning, Marife and Raquel were chatting like old friends downstairs in the living room. I prepared my coffee and they were not to disturb in their chat. I thought, good, so I have time to wake up and I don t need to be the entertainer for them. After a while, I don t know how long I was sitting in my thoughts and my coffee there, Raquel decide to clean the house and Marife and I should go shopping for the weekend. Anyway, I wanted to talk with her and to spend some time with her alone. The surprise came before we left. Raquel and I had short time to speak while Marife took her shower. Marife offered her before the truth about her life. She offered Raquel that she is since the beginning of this year married with a guy in Canada. This are only few month! What is she doing here? Why she did not tell it to me direct or personally before she offered it to a friend of mine, and not only to her, also the neighbour woman was informed. Only me got the information once more at last. By sure she will have her reasons not to tell me from the beginning, but after the last day, important to give me the right information. I felt like an idiot. Now I knew the reason why she will get a new passport. Now I understood the invalid passport from the day before, she showed on the police station. OK, we had not so much time to talk, but this could be cleared much more earlier. But in real, there was not really a reason to tell it to me from the beginning. We met us not as lovers, we met us as friend, we only wanted to spend some days together. That we are now official a couple was not planned but she has to stay till the next Friday to pick up the result of the medical prove. I was still sure that she is a victim in all what was happened a day before. I said nothing to Marife as she was finish with the shower.
Marife and I we drove with my car to the Mal, Raquel cleaned the house. I got a message from Raquel that she found a mobile phone and two SIM-cards in the things of Marife and that I should give her some hours to check out the numbers from the mobile and the cards. A mobile? I thought all her mobiles were stolen. Once more questions in my head. That Raquel did not trust her was clear, that she is spying now in the things of Marife was really a little bit to much. But in all what was happen I understood her. She is my friend and in worry about me. To spend some hours in a Mal is really not the problem, we were shopping and we went for lunch. Marife needs her rice. We started to chat and I built her the bridge to tell me all about her life. I made clear that I expect that she tells me all what I have to know, that I can protect her in front of all the doubts around. I still think it is the worst what can happen to a woman to get raped and no one believes. So far the proof is not given that she is included somehow I have to believe her, and if I am the only one. She told me that she will tell me all but not in a Mal, later at home.
We arrived with all the things we bought at home, I got the the result of the investigation of Raquel. She found nothing special what can give a prove that Marife is somehow included. I was happy about, so it must be a logic reason why she hide her third mobile and why she did not tell me all before. Anyway she has not to explain me anything. We were still only for the police a couple. That there is something moving in our feelings, we did not realize in this time. But also friends should be honest to each other. Marife and I went upstairs and she told me all about her marriage, the mobile, why she came here. After one week she was married with this Canadian guy he left Davao with the destination Canada. Marife found out his destination was not Canada, the next airport for him was Cebu to meet an other girl, before he was flying back to Canada one week later. She broke up any contact to him and as she found me in the date line she decided that she wanted to meet me, to come out of her place for a while. Like holiday from the normal family life, always caring about the brothers and sisters, the father who is not caring, the mother who left ten years before the family alone with seven kids.... and so on. She explained me her reaction after the experience with the two guys here. It was not the first time in her short life that things like this were happen. The fist time it was her cousin.. the brother beats her always if she could not organize enough rice or food for the family and the father did not care. For him seems the filled bottle more important. She changed her age in the profile because no one was interested in a serious talk if she offered her real age, she was afraid that I will find out that she is only 20, married but she planed to tell it to me.. It was only to less time for. I had no reason not to believe what she told me this evening. We were not a couple in love till now, we had no plans together. All we planed was to stay together till we get the result from the medical investigation and that I will be on her side against all doubts and suspecting against her. And the following week gives us time to know us better. We ended up wild kissing like in the first night.
In the evening Randy called and he came to pick us up to spend some time in a comedy bar to find some other thoughts. On the way he picked up his girlfriend as well and we spend a funny evening together. As we were back at home at 4AM Raquel suddenly packed her things and wanted to leave the house in the middle of the night. . Once more I could not understand her, why once more to run away in the middle of the night. I was happy that she was helping Marife and me, now she planed to run away once more. I reached that she will stay till the morning and I went to bed.
On Sunday morning Raquel was waiting in the living room till I was awaken, but her mobile was not working, so I had to repair it first before she left. She planed to travel to her brother to find there a place and maybe a new start. Marife and I spend a lovely day at home to find the silent back. Between she called at home her sister and asked to send her laptop here to Manila that I can work and that I can find maybe a new job. I was happy that she did it, also a further proof that she is not included in the crime. She called her other sister with her new number we organized the day before and asked her to send some money. In this way she told her that she is in Manila with me. Some hours later her husband called on her new number. He got the number direct from the sister. A new situation. They had a long call, between she came to me, kissed me and continued her call. What was this now? I did not ask, I felt that there was something starting between us. The rest was in this moment not my topic. She was here and he was in Canada. This gets my topic if she will one day decide to stay with all her things and not only for one or two weeks.
Monday, she collected the money from her sister and we went shopping to fill up the fridge. I did not want that she pays all, but I had no choice to stop her. Between always calls from her husband. On Tuesday her laptop received and I could start to work. In the evening she chatted, as well with her husband, but still we were living like teenagers in love in my house, we woke up every morning with a smile side by side and we fall in sleep arm in arm. The husband was only the shadow in the paradise. I realized that she still loves him as well, she was always different after a call from him, but I could not expect that she makes now a decision for me.. this needs time. Sometimes if he called she told him Marife is not here and she will call him back... He did not realize that he speaks with her personally.. sorry but if I call someone then I recognize the voice.. he not. She made this game not only one time. His only problem was that she get a new mobile and he sent her money to buy one. The rest seemed not important for him. He still was thinking that she is back in Davao and that she is waiting for him till he will show up for three weeks. Well, maybe it will be like he thinks. But she was with me. The rest of the days we had a really good time. Marife always in worry that she got enough rice. Really, this small girl was eating four times per day rice, with fish or meat or chicken. She started in the morning with cooking. Still don't know were she left all the rice she ate. But if she is hungry.. her thing. So long she will not get fat.. hahahha. I know only one reason to get fat, and this is if a woman get pregnant. By they way, Sol still thinks she is pregnant, but still no real proof. a friend tries to meet her but also there she found always a reason not to show up. But this will show the future, I still get sometimes hate messages from her but this should not disturb my happiness in the moment with Marife. We spoke about but it was not really a topic. This means not that I don't care, but I had no chance to go in touch with her to solve it out. Marife and I we were only happy.
On Friday we had our appointment in the NBI office to get the result of the medical investigation. To get a paper like this is not so easy here on the Philippines. First we had to fill out a form. Then we had to walk downstairs with a paper to get a stamp. This stamp gave the allowance in the office before that they can give us a new paper to pick up the document in an other office. Needs time. Sometimes i feel really sorry that I can not make a film out of it. The best what you can do is smiling, otherwise you get crazy. They did not find any signs of raping. I was happy about. Marife was sad, depressed, because she could now not bring the proof what was happen to her with the two guys in my house. She thought that really no one will believe her now and that the police will stop to investigate in her case and that they will reduce the investigation only on the robbery. It is sad, but this is the law. No proof no believe. Only we can work out this bad experience. I know it is true, I woke some nights before up because she was fighting in the sleep and was crying. As we were back home she went out of the house with the comment she will have a walk around the area alone. It was afternoon, a lot of people around, so I let her go. It got slowly dark, she was not back. I started to get worry. I tried to call her, no answer, I did not know were she was. I only received after a while a message that all is ok, she only wanted to be alone to think about all. It got later and later, then she called me that she is outside the area and that she is on the way back. I asked her if I should come there that we can go out. Maybe she will come on different thoughts. I changed my clothes and I met her in the 24 hour shop by the entrance of the area. We spend some time in a bar nearby and she ordered a beer. Normally not her drink. I thought she is old enough to decide what she want to drink. The beer was faster empty then I could turn around and she ordered the second bottle. Her goal was to get drunk this evening. After the second bottle her goal was reached and I packed her under my arms to bring her save at home. As we arrived at home she started to cry. I held her in my arms. She was crying more then a half a hour. I could not stop her. All broke out in this evening. I was not guilty in her tears, I was only there to dry them. This was all I could do.. to be there as she needed me. I think this was long time necessary that she could cry out all her pain she tried to hide so long.
On Saturday, she decided to fly home to Davao the following Monday. We drove out and she bought a ticket back to Davao, but this time not only an one way ticket, she booked directly the flight back to Manila on Saturday in the same week. On the way home she bought a lot of things for the family, but it was clear that she will be away on Monday morning. I was thinking about if I should fly with her, but I thought it is maybe for both of us good if we have some days time to think about what we really want in the future. One thing was clear.. if she comes back, then to me and we have the chance to start a new happy life.. married or not. If not then she made the decision for her old life. Then, I have to life with it. Also Sunday we were short shopping, then she was sleeping because the flight was 4:30 AM and I was watching TV. She packed only the things for her family in the case. All her clothes, her laptop remained here. Randy picked us up in the night and drove us to the airport. We were spending the time till the check in started in a Karaoke-Bar near the airport, but we both were sad that we have to spend now minimum one week alone. I still was not sure if she really want to come back..
The time for check in came. We went opposite the road to the small local airport and I was not allowed to enter the terminal without valid ticket. I was waiting outside till she checked in and then we spend some minutes till the boarding time started. I hate airports if I don't fly by myself. We kissed us the last time. I saw tears in her eyes, she turned around, back in the terminal with the words she learned in German: "Ich liebe Dich". Then I was alone...
As I arrived at home in this morning... I felt lost, alone, the house was empty. I went to sleep with the doubt if Marife really want to come back in the next Saturday early morning. All I knew was: I will be in this time at the airport...
matthias
The shadow in the paradies
...... The first time was really hard. I did not get my "wow girl" out of my brain and heart. I tried to get a friendship with her. But if we could speak online it was not like before. If I asked something, I got only answers like "ok" or "sure" and such things. It was not possible to come nearer to a friendship. Anyway I started to work, so that I was the whole week busy and we had only some short chats between. Emotional I felt not really good. One thing was clear. I had to finish the old stories somehow, to go further. Suzie called one day and she wanted to meet me, but I was not in mood to see her, especially if she thought I run direct if she only called that she is back in Manila, then she missed. Sol continued with her story that she is pregnant, but still not able to bring the honest prove from a doctor. Alma, she is the "wow girl", wanted to meet me, we made a date, I was on the way as I got the message of the cancellation..... I was really tiered of all this games.
I had to clean it all out. I sent Suzie a message that I wait for her on Saturday afternoon ten minutes in a Mal on her and that this will be her last chance to meet me, otherwise she will never get the possibility to go in touch with me. How I expect... she did not show up. I made an appointment with Sol that we can go together to the doctor for the proof.... also Sol did not show up to the appointment.. and this all without message. Really interesting, almost one message after the other but if its for me important... silent on the mobile.
I tried to be concentrated in my new job, sometimes Randy and I had some drinks after work, some flirts with easy girls and I tried to enjoy the paradise. I dated some girls, but with my feelings and heart I was somewhere else. From my first wages I bought a owner type jeep, so that I could be a little bit more flexible in my moving. This was the idea. This car was like a woman, it was not sure if I do not stand in the night somewhere and nothing works, or if I will come home. On the first weekend as I got the car and I thought that now everything is fixed, I answered a message from my "wow girl" if she is prepared for an adventure, she only needs to answer with "yes" or "no". She answered with "yes" and I replied that I will pick her up in two hours in her place. She gave me a new meeting point and I was with my funny new car on the way. Traffic on Saturday afternoon in Manila is not funny. But I was on the way. In the car my Speedminton rackets, some towels and what is necessary for a nice weekend on the beach. This was the idea, to pick her up and to make a trip to the next beach. I should pick her up in Cubao, a part of Quezon City, were she spent the night before at her aunts place. I was standing in the traffic and I sent her a message that I will be soon there and she should tell me where she will wait. I got the answer that I should choose the place and she will come if I will be there. I choose a coffee near the place and I sent her a message where I am... No answer. Fifteen minutes later I sent the second message, if she will come now or not... No answer. I called her. I woke her up with my call. I thought:' how can it be?' A half a hour before I arrived she answered direct.. I asked her whats on, that I wait for her and that I came now extra there to meet her. It was a little bit noisy around and the line was not really good, so I sent her once more a message. I felt anger started in me growing. The answer from her was. ' Sorry I feel really bad. my stomach hurts so much maybe next time.' I don t want to believe what I read on my phone... I answered only 'ok...thanxs'... and I now it was clear. That's it.. no longer silly games from this girl. This is not the way. This things you do only if you really hate someone. What did I to her? She knew exactly that I was on the way through half of the city, in Saturday afternoon traffic. I was more then angry. On top, on the way home the car stopped in the middle of the highway and it starts to rain.. What a day.. its starts with an idea, I wanted to create not a new relationship, I wanted to start with a good friendship..this was the idea. Now I was standing with my funny car on the highway in the night, and nothing works. That someone stopped and helps you?.. Not in this country. They are looking all friendly with a smile in the face, but no one helps. I tried it once more to bring this car to move, and ... what a wonder after fifteen minutes nothing.. the car was running normal. I was happy that I could leave the highway and I drove slowly beside on the normal road back home. This topic with Alma was done for me... i will never go in touch with her from my side. This is not the way to tread friends, and this is what she wanted from me.... She made herself invisible in her messenger and also from her side no contact.. I found on this day an interesting sentence in my horoscope: "Let people from your past stay in your past for now. They offer nothing but drama."... Maybe I should read my horoscope more often.....
In this time Raquel was living with me in my house. Raquel and I we are really good friends and she was running away once more from her family. We met us long time ago and since this time we are friends, so it was clear I help her if I can. I gave her space and time to think about herself. She cleaned the house and was washing all the clothes while I was working. I called her always "my smiley girl" because she is always happy, not inside but she never shows her problems.
In the new job it became more and more strange. I started with then job training with two other new employers. In the first week all was great, we got good information, we were a good group of motivated employers. It was for me after nine month doing only my things a new experience to work regular. In the second week we became in our small group a guy who is there in this company since two years employed and he should get the chance to change his job to get a dealer service representative like we. He was not really motivated because he did not want to go on this position in this company but the management pressed him in. From this day all changed in the training. After one more week an other new employed guy shows up and the trainer started to be more interested in the new guy as in continue our training that we can start with our job so soon as possible. There was something wrong. It is usual that after a theory training the status get proved, but after the first test only one of us passed the test. Melissa, Ronny, the guy who was long time employed there, and I we failed the first test. We could not understand why.. it is really not so difficult to understand what is important in the work flow. They made the test once more with us and... once more we failed. Between the new guy got private lessons from the trainer and we were only there, but complete ignored, questions were only answered beside. The second test was near the same then the first. But the points we got for the same answer was different. On top they told us suddenly, that we get now the last chance to make a third test and if we will fail once more we are out of the training and the company. No one from the employers understood this way from the management. Not usual and the first time that they did it like this. And... it was clear.. we will fail also the third time.. it was their plan. In the third test they included not relevant questions for the job, we should do in the future, and they asked us suddenly things they were mentioned only as beside information one time, also we never got the promised summary about the work flow, we asked so often about. Why? I can only assume. They used us as dummy that they have a reason to kick out Ronny from of the company. I got intern the prove for it, but I did not get it official.. so I can only assume. Silly, but this was the way in this company. Later on I got the message that the new guy passed the first test direct.. what a wonder...???
In this time I met Marife online. She contacted me first with a message in one of the date lines, I did not react. Like her profile there, 27, from Davao, not married and no kids. One day, she contacted me direct about my messenger. She is from Davao, far away from Manila, I had never in my mind to meet her so soon. I enjoyed only the funny chats with her every day. She brought me on other thoughts in this time we could meet us online and I forgot for a while all the strange things around the job and my private life. Sometimes in the morning if I opened my laptop and my messenger she was still online with her cam and I could watch her sleeping.. So cute. She was smiling while she slept. What a start in the day.
In a funny mood I invited her to come here to Manila with a one way ticket and we make an open end date. She can stay so long she want and she can be sure nothing will happen what she is not agree... anyway we were in front of a long weekend around May 1st and we would have time to know us better. She liked this idea and we planed that she will come about this long weekend, but only as friend. Tuesday, she sent me a message that she will come earlier.. she planed to come not Friday, she wanted to come the next day and that she is in the travel agency and if she should buy the ticket now. Normally no problem, but I had to work in this time as she will arrive at the airport and how to pick her up? I told it all to Raquel.. She offered direct to pick her up and I don't need to be worry. She will care about till I will come home in the night. My working shift was European time, so I had to work between 3PM and midnight. I could be earliest at home at 12:30 AM. Raquel said she will manage it. Ok.. Marife got the information that Raquel will pick her up, she booked the ticket. The day of arrival Raquel and I drove with my car for shopping , but on the way home the car stopped once more and it was not possible to start it again. We put the car on a secure place because I got really short in time to go to work. We took a trike with all the things we bought, I jumped quickly under the shower and went to work. All other things were organized.
I was the whole day really exited. There was a cute girl on the way to Manila. I was proud that a girl is doing things like this. She did not know who I am, she did not know what will happen if she is here, but she trusted me. How brave is this. Of course I can trust myself, but she travelled in an adventure. Between I got the update from Raquel, that all is ok, that she arrived and that they are on the way to my house. It was only one hour till I would be at home as they arrived. I drove with Randy at home and as I opened the door we saw us the first time in real. The girls had their chat and all seems perfect. Raquel and I decided that she will stay minimum till Friday so that Marife will not be alone in a place she don t know. We were direct familiar like old friends they meet after along time. Raquel went in her room to sleep and Marife and I started to chat in the living room. I offered her to sleep in my room and that I use the sofa downstairs, but she decided that we share my bed. Anyway it was clear that we are friends, and, maybe its not normal in a situation like this, but I can sleep beside a cute girl without touching on the wrong place. We prepared us for the bed, she wanted to sleep in her clothes and I was really tiered from the day. As I turned around, our faces were very near... suddenly we started to kiss.. it was not planed, not from her side and not from my side, but the kisses were sweet. I woke up in the morning and I saw her smile life beside me. What a wonderful feeling to see it in front of me and not only in the cam like before sometimes. I went downstairs and Raquel was sitting there with all her things she brought with her as she showed up. She told me that she will leave this day because she has to go to Pampanga to get her job back. She was there as she run the first time away from her business she wanted to start. She planed on this morning to go back there. I heard her in the night that she was not really sleeping, but I did not expect that she wanted to run away so quickly. She promised me before that she wanted to stay till Friday, but she decided to go on this morning. I saw some reactions as Raquel and Marife met in this morning, but it was clear between me and Raquel that we are friends and that I can help her only for some days. She could stay, no problem. I never would kick someone out of my house, especially not a special friend like Raquel. I was happy that she wanted to help me and that she created a nice welcome to Marife. I took my coffee and I was watching the two girls. Somehow they could not handle each other. Raquel managed the house perfect, and Marife tried to get the feeling to be at home. A little bit shy in this situation, but what you can expect from someone in this situation. After a while Raquel packed her things, turned around and was away. I could not understand her, like so often since we know us, so I let her go. She is a traveller, I think she runs away from herself. I connected her in the time as she was in my house with Cristina, a good friend of mine, and I thought this could work with Marife in the same way. But I missed...
It was raining this Thursday as if someone opened all air-locks. It was time to go to work. I felt not good to leave Marife alone in the house, but I had no other choice. I was nervous about this day, because this was the day of test three in the company. I still don't have an umbrella, so I got a little bit wet on the way to the company shuttle. On the way I got a message from Marife that she miss me already.. I went to work with a big smile in my face. Between my preparation for the final test I sent her some texts to be sure that she is ok and I was looking forward to the long weekend with her. The test failed, I resigned a contract I never got and Randy took me with him after our shift. I received a call on the way home from Marife, but I did not realize that it was not her phone she called. I was in the car and I did not expect that something maybe happen, anyway we were very near and we only wanted to start my car on the way, that I can bring it home. The car started directly and Randy followed me to my house. As we arrived I saw first my landlady, I thought what is she doing here in this time. It was 12:45 AM. Then all full of police and at last Marife, only in T-shirt and shorts. The face full of tears. I stopped the car in the middle of the road and jumped out. Marife direct in my arms. What was happen? She told me that two guys came in my house and that they robbed her money, her two mobiles and my laptop.... After three times asking if they did something to her she offered me that they raped her as well... I was in shock.. This in my house.. to a girl who trust me that all is secure and nothing will happen to her while she is there... I could not believe.. My landlady was shouting around, why a unknown girl is in my house while I am not there and she called her... I can not repeat, I am still in shock about such reaction and treating my guest. Marife got the horror and this woman has nothing better to do then to attack her. Of course it was for me also a stupid situation. What should I answer if they ask me who is this girl. I answered she is my new girlfriend and that she is the first day alone at home, but as they asked how long we know us, they were looking really surprised as I told them the truth that we know us only one day personally and that we met us online in a date line. But why to lie? I had no doubt that Marife tells the truth. Why she should create such a story? I was happy that Randy was there and that I had a support in the background. The two guys came through the back door. I opened this door always if I am at home that the wind goes through the house. I did not told Marife before I left to close the door in the night. She was sleeping in the living room in front of the TV and the door was open. Only the small door inside with the mosquito net was closed.. but this is not a real door for secure. The two guys were climbing over the wall closing the light and putting a knife on her head. She thought first as she woke up its me who kissed her, only as she felt that this guy has hairs she realized that it can not be me. Only the sound of a trike in front of the house saved her as she told the guys that I come home.. they run away, back over the wall and she was alone... The neighbour beside heard her crying in front of the house and they helped her in the first moments... She could not call me direct. The mobiles with my number were lost. She called me from the mobile from my landlady... but this was one hour later.
The rest of the night we spent on different police stations. First in the local outpoint, they reported the case in a book. Marife showed her passport. I was in wonder that this passport was marked with holes. My landlady always beside, and she continued to attack her. I had to stop her with her comments. Marife was in the process to renew her passport and her normal ID was in her stolen wallet. Should she show up on the police without identification? I felt the police don't believe her and they were more interested in my stolen laptop then what happen to her. The reaction after all from Marife was normal, she shows maybe not the typical reactions of a woman after an experience like this, but this can not be the reason not to believe. We got sent to the mayor police station for investigation and we travelled in the middle of the night to the other side of Paranaque City. The same process. Once more the case got reported in a book. The policeman was more exited about my stolen laptop and also he did not believe Marife. My landlady was busy flirting with Randy and continued with her respect less comments. Only our neighbour and I, we tried to protect Marife in front of this wall of mistrust. It was 4 AM as I suddenly received a message from one of the stolen mobiles of Marife. I received a message I got in the afternoon from her. This comes now from one of the guys. I saw a chance to catch them. I answered and I offered them a lot of money for my laptop in hope that I can make a deal and to catch them on this way. Anyway they could not use the computer, first password protected, second all programs in German, then without charger... difficult to use it or to sell it to someone. They replied with an higher price I offered them. I was agree, but I never got any answer or message from them...
Between they separated us and I had to go in an other room. As I came in there, three drunken men were laying around and it was smelling there like in a bar. One of them reached to stand up from his sleeping place and looked at me like someone looks if you are complete drunk. He took a seat in front of and old dirty computer, but he was only looking on his monitor. He played with the mouse, but nothing happen on his monitor. The computer was off. Then he stood up, opened a small book on the table beside, opened it, found nothing interesting in, closed it and went back in front of his monitor. This all without any word. He played with his mouse, but still nothing happened on his monitor. At last he reached it to open the computer somehow and he asked my name. His job was only to fill out a form to order the special investigators to safe the finger prints in my house. I spelled him my name and my address. Letter by letter. As he tried to read it once more, nothing was right. I stood up, asked if I can have a look and if I can help him somehow. As I saw what this man typed in the form it was clear that he can not read it. He was so drunk that he typed my details always one or two letters beside the right one on the keyboard. In the end I filled out the form so that it can be sent out to the other office for investigation. Fifteen minutes later I could leave this show and I left the office. My landlady still by flirting with Randy, he was really nerved from her. But a scandal on the police station in this time was not a really good idea, so he tried to be patiently and kept her away from their attacks against Marife. The result of the visit on this police station was, the special investigators will come some hours later and that we should not touch anything in the house. Also, Marife and I we should come some hours later once more, cause she has to speak with a female officer as well.
It was 6 AM as we were back at home, but was it still my home after all what was happen the last night? It was holiday May 1st, I expected from this weekend really some happy moments and not a horror trip like this. We tried to cam down and to sleep, but really sleep was not. I was sad, angry and disappointed that things like this are happen to my guest and me in my home. Two hours later i got the information that the special investigators will come later, so we used the time to drive once more to the main police station so that Marife can make the interview with the female officer and that she get the paper for the medical tests. Our neighbour supported us that we get treated correct from the police. Once more the case got reported in a big book. We filled out a new form, and I realized that Marife is not 27, like in her profile, she is only 20. I looked at her as I realized it, but I said nothing in this moment. This was the wrong place and time to clear this point. But it was working in my head.. was there something wrong with her? Was she maybe included in all? Are they all right in the doubt against her? Was there something more what I should know and she is hiding in front of me? It was not logic that she is included in this crime and that all was planed from her. To go through all the investigations, questions and doubts only about a laptop, some money and two mobiles? She could have it much more easier, she was long enough alone at home. She paid her ticket to Manila by herself, there is no profit. Makes no idea to create a story like this. I had no doubt that all was true she told about the last night. We got a new paper for the highest investigation office, NBI, for the medical prove. Before this was not made she could not take a shower, so we had to do it at the same day. But first we had to drive back home, we still was waiting for the special investigators. Raquel called, I sent her a massage in the night as the police asked me who else was in the house the last days, and I told her short what was happen in the last night. She was still in Manila, not like I expect in Pampanga, four hours bus travel from Manila. I asked her to come to my house, that the police can take her finger prints as well and that they will not search for the wrong person. Also I thought it is maybe good if a woman supported Marife. Raquel arrived in the same time as the investigators were arrived. Once more to fill out forms, they took from us the finger prints, and they powdered all full to find some more prints. It was like in the TV. They packed an empty box of cigarettes in plastic, I found it in the bathroom, and a half smoked cigarette from the floor. One hour later all was done and the investigators were leaving. In all this trouble was not the time to speak with Marife alone about her age.
Raquel, Marife and I had to travel to the NBI for the medical prove. I only wanted to take a shower after this night and then to the next step. The water was once more not running. I wanted to see on this day everyone but not my landlady, after all she said in the last night. But I had no other choice. The water has to be fixed. I sent her a message and she showed up with the plumper. While the plumper tried to fix the water this woman started to attack Raquel and Marife once more and she complained that the house was not cleaned. Sorry, but after so many police and investigations, how should the house be clean? She yelled around and titled the girls with the worst words I ever heard from a woman. And this from a woman who thinks she is in business, this was once more without respect. Especially if she tries in the background to start beside her marriage an affair with Randy. (She send till today nearby everyday a message to Randy and tries to get a date). Now it was time to show her the barrier. It is her job to secure a property that things like last night can never happen and it is not her thing who is my visitor and that she should show more respect in front of my visitors and to control her words. The plumper was finish and I asked her to go out of my view before i forget my good education. Then it was silent for a while. I took my shower, then we left the house for the travel to the NBI. I decide to drive with the taxi, because I had no mood on this day to stop with my car somewhere and with the jeepney through the city after this night was also not really funny. Raquel chatted with the driver and Marife felt in sleep on my shoulder. I watched out of the window and tried to find the reason for all. It was really difficult to wake up Marife as we arrived the office in Manila. If she sleeps, then really deep. First we had to go in this building in the investigation office. May 1st, holiday, the office was full with the families from the officers, they had their family party there, with a lot of food, the TV was running and we were standing there in the middle of the room, tiered, frustrated and once more the case got written down in a big book. Once more the police man did not believe Marife, my laptop was more important. The same like before. After all was reported once more, the girls were sent to the medical office and the officer took me beside and asked me about my point of view. We had a good talk about all and I had the feeling they will do really something to find the two guys. I followed to the medical office were the girls got asked once more. Once more the case got reported in a big book. The doctor asked me if I agree that he will make the investigation with Marife and I told him, that he should better ask her if she is agree that a man is doing it. Anyway we had no other choice, a female doctor was only on the next day available. Raquel supported Marife, I was waiting outside. I called my sister, I had the feeling I have to speak with someone.
Twenty minutes later and after three times running upstairs to make some copies and to get from an other office a stamp on the papers, we were finish in this office with a new appointment in the hand to pick up the result one week later. I was now 36 hours without sleep. It was 6 PM, we all were tiered and hungry. On the way home we went to eat, but we all did not speak so much. The food did not taste, I thought about to make a scandal in this restaurant about the grab they served, but I decide to take it from the easy way. I was to tiered. The taxi driver did not know were he should bring us. I showed him the way were he could drop us out in front of a 24 hours shop, we bought some things for at home and the then we used a jeepney for the rest of the way at home. Marife was sleeping on my shoulder and Raquel was busy with her mobile. All I wanted on this moment was sleeping.
As I woke up in the morning, Marife and Raquel were chatting like old friends downstairs in the living room. I prepared my coffee and they were not to disturb in their chat. I thought, good, so I have time to wake up and I don t need to be the entertainer for them. After a while, I don t know how long I was sitting in my thoughts and my coffee there, Raquel decide to clean the house and Marife and I should go shopping for the weekend. Anyway, I wanted to talk with her and to spend some time with her alone. The surprise came before we left. Raquel and I had short time to speak while Marife took her shower. Marife offered her before the truth about her life. She offered Raquel that she is since the beginning of this year married with a guy in Canada. This are only few month! What is she doing here? Why she did not tell it to me direct or personally before she offered it to a friend of mine, and not only to her, also the neighbour woman was informed. Only me got the information once more at last. By sure she will have her reasons not to tell me from the beginning, but after the last day, important to give me the right information. I felt like an idiot. Now I knew the reason why she will get a new passport. Now I understood the invalid passport from the day before, she showed on the police station. OK, we had not so much time to talk, but this could be cleared much more earlier. But in real, there was not really a reason to tell it to me from the beginning. We met us not as lovers, we met us as friend, we only wanted to spend some days together. That we are now official a couple was not planned but she has to stay till the next Friday to pick up the result of the medical prove. I was still sure that she is a victim in all what was happened a day before. I said nothing to Marife as she was finish with the shower.
Marife and I we drove with my car to the Mal, Raquel cleaned the house. I got a message from Raquel that she found a mobile phone and two SIM-cards in the things of Marife and that I should give her some hours to check out the numbers from the mobile and the cards. A mobile? I thought all her mobiles were stolen. Once more questions in my head. That Raquel did not trust her was clear, that she is spying now in the things of Marife was really a little bit to much. But in all what was happen I understood her. She is my friend and in worry about me. To spend some hours in a Mal is really not the problem, we were shopping and we went for lunch. Marife needs her rice. We started to chat and I built her the bridge to tell me all about her life. I made clear that I expect that she tells me all what I have to know, that I can protect her in front of all the doubts around. I still think it is the worst what can happen to a woman to get raped and no one believes. So far the proof is not given that she is included somehow I have to believe her, and if I am the only one. She told me that she will tell me all but not in a Mal, later at home.
We arrived with all the things we bought at home, I got the the result of the investigation of Raquel. She found nothing special what can give a prove that Marife is somehow included. I was happy about, so it must be a logic reason why she hide her third mobile and why she did not tell me all before. Anyway she has not to explain me anything. We were still only for the police a couple. That there is something moving in our feelings, we did not realize in this time. But also friends should be honest to each other. Marife and I went upstairs and she told me all about her marriage, the mobile, why she came here. After one week she was married with this Canadian guy he left Davao with the destination Canada. Marife found out his destination was not Canada, the next airport for him was Cebu to meet an other girl, before he was flying back to Canada one week later. She broke up any contact to him and as she found me in the date line she decided that she wanted to meet me, to come out of her place for a while. Like holiday from the normal family life, always caring about the brothers and sisters, the father who is not caring, the mother who left ten years before the family alone with seven kids.... and so on. She explained me her reaction after the experience with the two guys here. It was not the first time in her short life that things like this were happen. The fist time it was her cousin.. the brother beats her always if she could not organize enough rice or food for the family and the father did not care. For him seems the filled bottle more important. She changed her age in the profile because no one was interested in a serious talk if she offered her real age, she was afraid that I will find out that she is only 20, married but she planed to tell it to me.. It was only to less time for. I had no reason not to believe what she told me this evening. We were not a couple in love till now, we had no plans together. All we planed was to stay together till we get the result from the medical investigation and that I will be on her side against all doubts and suspecting against her. And the following week gives us time to know us better. We ended up wild kissing like in the first night.
In the evening Randy called and he came to pick us up to spend some time in a comedy bar to find some other thoughts. On the way he picked up his girlfriend as well and we spend a funny evening together. As we were back at home at 4AM Raquel suddenly packed her things and wanted to leave the house in the middle of the night. . Once more I could not understand her, why once more to run away in the middle of the night. I was happy that she was helping Marife and me, now she planed to run away once more. I reached that she will stay till the morning and I went to bed.
On Sunday morning Raquel was waiting in the living room till I was awaken, but her mobile was not working, so I had to repair it first before she left. She planed to travel to her brother to find there a place and maybe a new start. Marife and I spend a lovely day at home to find the silent back. Between she called at home her sister and asked to send her laptop here to Manila that I can work and that I can find maybe a new job. I was happy that she did it, also a further proof that she is not included in the crime. She called her other sister with her new number we organized the day before and asked her to send some money. In this way she told her that she is in Manila with me. Some hours later her husband called on her new number. He got the number direct from the sister. A new situation. They had a long call, between she came to me, kissed me and continued her call. What was this now? I did not ask, I felt that there was something starting between us. The rest was in this moment not my topic. She was here and he was in Canada. This gets my topic if she will one day decide to stay with all her things and not only for one or two weeks.
Monday, she collected the money from her sister and we went shopping to fill up the fridge. I did not want that she pays all, but I had no choice to stop her. Between always calls from her husband. On Tuesday her laptop received and I could start to work. In the evening she chatted, as well with her husband, but still we were living like teenagers in love in my house, we woke up every morning with a smile side by side and we fall in sleep arm in arm. The husband was only the shadow in the paradise. I realized that she still loves him as well, she was always different after a call from him, but I could not expect that she makes now a decision for me.. this needs time. Sometimes if he called she told him Marife is not here and she will call him back... He did not realize that he speaks with her personally.. sorry but if I call someone then I recognize the voice.. he not. She made this game not only one time. His only problem was that she get a new mobile and he sent her money to buy one. The rest seemed not important for him. He still was thinking that she is back in Davao and that she is waiting for him till he will show up for three weeks. Well, maybe it will be like he thinks. But she was with me. The rest of the days we had a really good time. Marife always in worry that she got enough rice. Really, this small girl was eating four times per day rice, with fish or meat or chicken. She started in the morning with cooking. Still don't know were she left all the rice she ate. But if she is hungry.. her thing. So long she will not get fat.. hahahha. I know only one reason to get fat, and this is if a woman get pregnant. By they way, Sol still thinks she is pregnant, but still no real proof. a friend tries to meet her but also there she found always a reason not to show up. But this will show the future, I still get sometimes hate messages from her but this should not disturb my happiness in the moment with Marife. We spoke about but it was not really a topic. This means not that I don't care, but I had no chance to go in touch with her to solve it out. Marife and I we were only happy.
On Friday we had our appointment in the NBI office to get the result of the medical investigation. To get a paper like this is not so easy here on the Philippines. First we had to fill out a form. Then we had to walk downstairs with a paper to get a stamp. This stamp gave the allowance in the office before that they can give us a new paper to pick up the document in an other office. Needs time. Sometimes i feel really sorry that I can not make a film out of it. The best what you can do is smiling, otherwise you get crazy. They did not find any signs of raping. I was happy about. Marife was sad, depressed, because she could now not bring the proof what was happen to her with the two guys in my house. She thought that really no one will believe her now and that the police will stop to investigate in her case and that they will reduce the investigation only on the robbery. It is sad, but this is the law. No proof no believe. Only we can work out this bad experience. I know it is true, I woke some nights before up because she was fighting in the sleep and was crying. As we were back home she went out of the house with the comment she will have a walk around the area alone. It was afternoon, a lot of people around, so I let her go. It got slowly dark, she was not back. I started to get worry. I tried to call her, no answer, I did not know were she was. I only received after a while a message that all is ok, she only wanted to be alone to think about all. It got later and later, then she called me that she is outside the area and that she is on the way back. I asked her if I should come there that we can go out. Maybe she will come on different thoughts. I changed my clothes and I met her in the 24 hour shop by the entrance of the area. We spend some time in a bar nearby and she ordered a beer. Normally not her drink. I thought she is old enough to decide what she want to drink. The beer was faster empty then I could turn around and she ordered the second bottle. Her goal was to get drunk this evening. After the second bottle her goal was reached and I packed her under my arms to bring her save at home. As we arrived at home she started to cry. I held her in my arms. She was crying more then a half a hour. I could not stop her. All broke out in this evening. I was not guilty in her tears, I was only there to dry them. This was all I could do.. to be there as she needed me. I think this was long time necessary that she could cry out all her pain she tried to hide so long.
On Saturday, she decided to fly home to Davao the following Monday. We drove out and she bought a ticket back to Davao, but this time not only an one way ticket, she booked directly the flight back to Manila on Saturday in the same week. On the way home she bought a lot of things for the family, but it was clear that she will be away on Monday morning. I was thinking about if I should fly with her, but I thought it is maybe for both of us good if we have some days time to think about what we really want in the future. One thing was clear.. if she comes back, then to me and we have the chance to start a new happy life.. married or not. If not then she made the decision for her old life. Then, I have to life with it. Also Sunday we were short shopping, then she was sleeping because the flight was 4:30 AM and I was watching TV. She packed only the things for her family in the case. All her clothes, her laptop remained here. Randy picked us up in the night and drove us to the airport. We were spending the time till the check in started in a Karaoke-Bar near the airport, but we both were sad that we have to spend now minimum one week alone. I still was not sure if she really want to come back..
The time for check in came. We went opposite the road to the small local airport and I was not allowed to enter the terminal without valid ticket. I was waiting outside till she checked in and then we spend some minutes till the boarding time started. I hate airports if I don't fly by myself. We kissed us the last time. I saw tears in her eyes, she turned around, back in the terminal with the words she learned in German: "Ich liebe Dich". Then I was alone...
As I arrived at home in this morning... I felt lost, alone, the house was empty. I went to sleep with the doubt if Marife really want to come back in the next Saturday early morning. All I knew was: I will be in this time at the airport...
continue with---> "Mixed emotions"